Hmmm…. the title sounds like a really bad Celine Dion cover band doesn’t it? This blog was a challenge. I usually don’t accept challenges however one of the greatest books ever written was written on a challenge. His editor bet Theodore Giesel (a.k.a. Dr Seuss) $50 that he could not write an entire book using only 50 words. The result… Green Eggs and Ham. Yes Green Eggs and Ham is one of the greatest books ever written – don’t try to argue that point with me because Dr. Seuss is one of the best authors of all time.
Anyway, the challenge came from a coworker who buys chocolate wrapped in foil with inspirational sayings on the inside. The challenge was that I couldn’t write a blog using all of the wrappers inspirational messages that we have collected. I actually completed this task and it goes:
Feel free to be yourself because you are delicious. Be a little naughty with the nice and sleep late tomorrow. Forget the rules and play by your heart because we all must indulge in the moments that matter the most. Life is tough so give yourself a break and laugh everyday – it’s like “inner jogging.” Don’t settle for a spark – light a fire instead and this will stir your sense of pleasure. Live well, laugh often and love much so you may indulge in your every whim. Smiling is free so love every moment and discover yourself. When you embrace the positive you shine because those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. You are exactly where you are supposed to be.
O dear God that was painful! For anyone needing to make a graduation speech this year please feel free to copy the above paragraph. There is a definite correlation between how much chocolate is in the candy and how much sugary sentiment gets added to the wrapper. So challenge aside… I started looking at these wrappers while at work and came up with some much better advice (insert devil on left shoulder here). Keep in mind these pieces of advise come from someone who could be your only line of help in an emergency so take them seriously!
Feel free to be yourself – however if being you involves riding in tricked out Mitsubishi with neon lights and glass pack muffler be prepared to get pulled over by a police officer.
You’re delicious – but I do NOT need to hear why someone thinks that!
Be a little naughty with the nice – If I did that on a daily basis I would be fired before noon.
Sleep late tomorrow – Also will get you fired.
Forget the rules and play by your heart – this works for some things however if your heart wants a $300 Coach purse there are rules – like you have to pay for it before leaving the store.
Indulge in the moments that matter the most – this does not mean you may become so involved with your child’s sporting event that you start a fight with the other parents, coach or referee.
Laugh everyday it’s like “inner jogging” – laughing just became exercise…dammit!
Life is tough – give yourself a break – wait isn’t this a Kit Kat commercial?… totally ripping off the other chocolate!
Don’t settle for a spark – light a fire instead – this is bad advice as lighting a fire is considered arson.
You make everything lovely – and if you don’t your neighbors will complain about your 1990 Chevy Caprice with 4 flat tires being parked on the road.
Live well, laugh often and love much – just don’t love too much or you will end up on Jerry or Maury on one of the paternity test shows.
Indulge in your every whim – see the Coach purse incident above.
Discover yourself – in the privacy of your own home and not in a public park or shopping mall parking lot.
Smiling is free – but not if you have a child with braces.
Happiness looks good on you – but the glitter spandex pants should be taken back to the store.
Live your dreams – but only the ones rated PG. Does anyone know where I can find a flying blue tiger? (note to self stop eating spicy food before bed)
You are exactly where you are supposed to be – Really?!?!?!?!?! I see myself in a more tropical climate.
Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves – well there you go – that would be my problem!
Daydreaming is free – it’s also free to have to explain to your boss how come you messed up your job in the middle of your daydream.
When you embrace the positive you shine – wow that must be why 911 centers are generally dull and drab.
Compromise is a sign of strength not weakness – whoever wrote this does not have a teenager.
I will leave you with my own little piece of inspiration…..this is the picture i took out the back door the other morning.